Red Pencil Diaries

Last week I had a miscarriage. I was later diagnosed as having an "imcompetent cervix"--meaning that I have a weak cervix that at around 18 to 20 weeks, will dilate and I will go into labor without really knowing it, but there is no way to diagnose this problem until it happens... however, when we get pregnant again, they can treat it (80 to 90% sucessfully). The baby was 6 oz. and 8 1/2" long. It was a girl. We named her Willa Michele (after Dave and myself).

I''ve not been sure how to feel or what to feel about all this. I''ve been grieving and crying and asking "why me." But today I started to feel a bit more hopeful. I need to get back on the horse and try again. I can''t give up now. My doctor wants me to try again in three months. And I am trying to stay positive and say that next time things will be different. But I still can''t stop crying when I see something that reminds me of what happened. I can only hope that it won''t take us as long to get pregnant again as it took this time....

Physically, I am doing well. Mentally, I''m not sure. But at least today I started to see a small ray of light. And I guess at this point, that''s a good start...

Last week I accompanied Dave to HP World Conference in Atlanta. I did get to go to the expo one day and gather free trinkets and speak with the "booth people," many of whom were "professional booth babes" according to Jason.

I spent some time hanging out in the hotel. Bought a couple of tacky but awesome new purses. Went swimming a bit. Overall, it was a fun time.

In the Atlanta airport, I noticed way too many fashion emergencies. It seemed to be the thing to wear tall sandals with your toes hanging off the front and/or your heels hanging off the back. Totally tacky. Oh, and one girl had on pink terry cloth low-rise sweatpants which were stuffed up her butt crack along with the black thong underwear that showed through the thin material. EWWWWWW. I was only too happy to get home to the usual array of mullets and NASCAR t-shirts.

And since this week the KY State Fair is going on, I may have to head out there one evening to view the livestock and the tacky kentuckians. woohoo.

Tonight Dave and I are going out to look at some houses in Indiana with our real estate agent. We''re kind of excited. We looked over the descriptions and narrowed our list down to about 15 houses. The agent had sent us nearly 30 pages of info!

We''re hoping to find a place with at least an acre of land. I think all the places on our list fit that criteria.

At least the house shopping is taking my mind off of the work crap. Well, it is just a bit, anyway. Wish us luck in the house search!